So yesterday, Sunday Aug. 28th, was supposed to be another visit between Carlos and Sage in Salamanca. Why I keep hoping beyond reason that each impending visit will be the one where Ana finally feels compelled to show up is beyond me, but once again, I thought that this one might work out. I talked to Carlos last night after he had driven the 1 1/2 hours back to San Miguel, and lo and behold, guess who never showed up. Carlos sat and waited in the plaza where the two-hour visits are scheduled to take place, in vain, until his lawyer showed up about an hour later to see how things were going; since we'd started a tradition while I was in Mexico of showing up at their house when they missed the visits, Carlos and his lawyers decided to do just that.
Knowing that by this point, the security guards at the entrance were probably pretty familiar with their vehicles, and instructed by Ana's father not to let them in, Carlos and the lawyers decided to park a bit further away and walk in. The sidewalk, however, still requires that they walk by the guards, and none of them were surprised when the guard informed them that they did not have permission to enter. Righteously determined, however, to make Ana and her complicit family face the visits they were denying Carlos each time they skipped out, they walked past the rent-a-cops anyway, explaining the court-ordered visits, and over to the gate in front of Ana's parents' house. Carlos' lawyer began ringing the doorbell again and again, until Ana's father and mother came out and walked over to the guard to ask why he had let them in. He replied, "they used "force," which simply meant that they had ignored his requests to stay out. During the interchange that followed, Ana's father repeated multiple times to my brother that he'd "told him he didn't want to work with the lawyers, and that he (Carlos) needs to talk to him (Ana's dad) alone. Carlos told him that he was using the visits with Sage as a bargaining tool and that those, at the very least, are not in any way negotiable. Ana's mother tried to say that they had shown up to "the visit on Saturday," and were there from 10-5. Here are the multiple problems with that story:
1.) The Saturday visit she was referring to was part of the proposed new visit schedule, and was not to be finalized until the child services agency had received payment and approved the schedule. It was never confirmed in any way, and in fact, Carlos and his attorney had rejected the schedule proposed by child/family services almost a week ago, because it had cut hours from his visit.
2.) Ana's mom said they were there from 10-5, but child and family services had already said they couldn't work with that schedule, and could only be there until 3:00.
3.) For the select few visits that Ana has actually shown up to, she has NEVER stayed longer than 15 minutes if Carlos wasn't there on time. It is absolutely unbelievable that she would have stayed from 10-5 with him not there.
Presumably, this is all stuff that can easily be confirmed anyway, but this is yet another example of how this family just says whatever sounds good at the moment, regardless of whether they've said the opposite the week before, or if what they're saying amounts to "water is dry." As they stood there talking, Carlos remembered that just prior to the scheduled visit 6 days ago, his lawyer had received a text message from Ana stating that her mother had been in a serious car accident the night before, and was in "grave condition." When Carlos said, "aren't you supposed to be in the hospital, in grave condition no less," her dad said, "ARE YOU A DOCTOR?" So now, not only are we supposed to believe that Ana's family coincidentally has a valid excuse for missing visits at least three times/week, but they're also miracle healers.
So now, it's been almost two months since my brother has seen his son, Sage, and the saddest, and most infuriating, part of all of this, is not the now predictable behavior of Ana and her parents, but the fact that the judge has been doing little more than sitting on his hands when it comes to responding to all the evidence of Ana's continued criminal behavior, her missed visits, and deliberate alienation of Sage from his father. He has made empty threats for so long now that even Ana has his number, and when he promises that, "if she continues to skip visits he can change custody," and if she skips visits he can fine her, or bring charges against her, and when he orders that she provide proof of Sage's illnesses causing them to miss visits or to produce a list of all his extracurricular activities for Carlos to be able to attend, and she IGNORES ALL OF IT THE SECOND SHE LEAVES THE COURTROOM, and he DOES NOTHING, he not only reinforces the behavior and jeopardizes Carlos' faith in the impartiality of the Mexican legal system, but he makes himself look like a floorboard that anyone and everyone can just walk all over, and his courtroom look like a hall of jesters.
And so, another week has begun, another week when the judge has the opportunity to do the right thing...to do his job; another week where we continue to hope that Carlos and Sage will rightfully be able to spend time together. As for myself, my work schedule picks up a little bit this week, and my daughter returns to school, so I may find it a bit more difficult to be as diligent with updating the blog, but I will continue to post anything new that I hear from my brother. I also plan to contact, once again, Representative Mike Rogers regarding H.R. 1940 (who has yet to respond to any of my inquiries regarding this issue thus far); I plan to write a personal letter to the judge in Mexico, and a letter regarding the discrepancy in the U.S.' involvement in assisting left-behind parents when they are government officials vs. "regular" citizens (to try and publicize), and make a request for info in my brother's case using the freedom of information act.
Let's hope for some good news this week :) May you all have a good one!
--Sonia
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